1) I often think it would be funny if a car explodes on the highway IF AND ONLY IF the car is occupied by a driver who rides your bumper while you are going 70 mph then passes you in anger as their speed inches closer to the 100 mph mark.
2) Sometimes I get the urge to run over people in motorized wheelchairs IF AND ONLY IF they are traveling at a snails pace across a crosswalk. I understand the people are handicapped, but the motorized wheelchairs aren't. Can't they go faster than a foot per hour? If not, there is a serious design flaw there.
3) When I see morbidly obese people eating the largest size ice cream available at ColdStone Creamery, I sometimes hope that they will literally explode. Maybe then they will understand that the amount of ice cream they eat will indeed end up killing them some day.
4) I've always thought it would be hilarious if a dolphin at one of those dolphin trick Seaworld-type shows missed a trick and ended up jumping out of the tank and landing on someone in the front row.
That's all of the humor I can take for now. If you also think these things would be funny, please speak up so I don't feel so alone.
3 comments:
Who are you trying to fool? We all know that the IF AND ONLY IF statement doesn't apply. These people could be innocently going about their business and you would still wish to see these things.....
Don't lie.
Funny though....only you. :)
That kid is fat....did she eat a truck?
You are not alone those things would be hilarious, and that kid is a porker. If she knew I said porker she may eat herself cause it reminded her of bacon.
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